I Lost 1,000 Pounds Last Week

Let me set the scene so that you can be in the moment with me.

The only sound I hear was the tinkling of water in Turtle’s tank. The sun was really bright and I kept hearing wild geese fly overhead. Bella, Alyssa’s puppy, stayed nestled in a ball on my lap while I clicked away on the keyboard. Everything was calm and quiet.

Occasionally I would hear Alyssa sneeze from the other room.

Earlier last week I stayed home to take care of my sick child. With a temperature of 103 degrees, body aches, chills, headache, coughing, clogged sinuses and all other symptoms accompanied with the flu and bronchitis, Alyssa was not in the best of moods. I can’t blame her either because she has been one sick chick. She is much more of a trooper than I have ever been, even now as I quickly approach the big five zero.

That made shivers run up my spine.

Wanting to be quiet so that Alyssa could rest when I was home taking care of her, I sat at the computer surfing and typing. Since I’m a little deaf, I told her to simply knock on the wall with “something” when she needed me.

When I left her room, Alyssa’s glass was filled with icy Sprite, the curtains drawn tight to keep the light from billowing in and blankets were tucked up under her chin.

Within thirty minutes I heard a knock, knock, knock on the wall.

I removed Bella from my lap, placed her in the chair and ran to Alyssa’s room. That wasn’t a misuse of the word “ran.” I literally ran to her room because I didn’t know if the knock, knock, knock meant that she was vomiting or just needed a refill for her glass.

Yes, Alyssa is seventeen years old, but will always be my little girl. She is also a short, petite girl with not an ounce of fat on her 105 pound frame. That simply means that she has no reserves when illness strikes.

I, on the other hand, have this stuff called fat that decided to shove my skin out here and there into shapes that do not delight me. I will never understand why it can’t all just go to my boobs. That would really be the perfect solution and I would be quite happy with a full, overflowing size D or E cup bra.Don’t tell me that it would make my back hurt. That’s like telling me white, glow-in-the-dark skin is more beautiful than golden bronzed, tanned skin.

Yes, your words would fall on deaf ears.

It does not compute!

No comprende!

I can not hear you-u-u-u-u-u-u-u!

Let’s get back to the knocking on the wall. Every fifteen to thirty minutes for a forty-eight hour period, I heard a knock, knock, knock on the wall and each time the same unknown factor caused me to run to her room like a woman shopping for shoes on Black Friday.

After many hours of this routine, I was rather tired since I had exerted more energy in unintentional exercise than I had for quite a long time. My philosophy for many years has been that there is no need to run unless a lion is chasing me. Thankfully, that hasn’t been happening.

During Alyssa’s sickness, I was running and doing my best to make her comfortable. She isn’t completely over the bronchitis part of her illness now, but the flu is gone and a beautiful smile is in it’s place.

Between the worry and the exercise, I lost 1,000 pounds last week!

Seriously! I’ve had a dramatic weight loss.

When I slipped into my slacks yesterday, I thought, “Could it really be so? Maybe my eyes were just playing tricks on me?” The true test was that evening after I got home. I grabbed the jeans and with very little effort, pulled them up. Yep, sure enough, I had baggy butt.

Who said children with the flu was a bad thing?