My Cold Is Your Fault Per The Science

Since I now have a voice that sounds like a man, a raw red mustache under my nose, a temperature and feel pretty yucky, I am limited to the amount of philosophizing I can do on the great subjects of life because YOU gave me a cold. Yes, you did and I’ll show you how I caught it from you. So if you are wondering why the picture is blurry, it is because I don’t want you to see how miserable I look with these horrendous germs in my body.

What Is A Cold?

Let’s start with what a cold is so that we have a basic understanding.

It is estimated that Americans come down with and suffer one billion colds per year. This year I’m one of those unlucky billion.

A cold is a large number of different viruses that are exhibited in symptoms of the upper respiratory tract. The main culprit for the common cold is the rhinovirus even though there are more than two hundred viruses that can cause this condition.

The rhinoviruses are usually most prevalent during the early fall, spring and summer and there are more than 110 different types of the rhinovirus. When the seasons change, so does the relative humidity which causes the prevalence of colds. Low humidity and drier nose linings from colder weather make people more vulnerable to viral infections.

How Do You Catch The Common Cold?

Now I come to the part of how you catch the common cold and why I say you gave it to me.

You can catch the common cold by:

• touching something contaminated with the germs such as a door, doorknob, shopping cart, computer keyboard or pen, then touch your nose or mouth.
• coming in contact with the secretions of someone with a cold who has sneezed.

The cold virus attaches to the lining in your nose or throat where the germs are attacked by white blood cells. If you haven’t come in contact with that exact virus before, the first white blood cell attack will fail and your body will send more to the infected area. This causes your nose and throat to become inflamed and start producing LOTS and LOTS and LOTS of mucus. Much of your energy is expended on fighting the virus, so usually you feel very tired and run down.

Obviously, while I have been out and about in the great area of Richmond, Virginia, one of you sneezed and left the secretions floating in the air long enough for me to walk through them OR when I hugged/kissed people this past week, one of them had the germs on their body! I don’t know which one of you did it, but I know someone passed their germ onto me! Well, ugh!

What Am I Doing Now Since I’m Infected?

There are several things I’m doing now that I have become infected with the germs of the common cold.

I am drinking lots of fluids including my homemade natural remedy juice that includes lots of lemons to boost my immunity. I have not found a zinc lozenge or vitamin C tablet without corn syrup/corn starch, so I haven’t been able to use these helpful remedies.

Some of the other things I’m doing include sneezing, coughing, blowing my nose, taking ibuprofen for my headache, breathing on my nebulizer to prevent it turning into bronchitis, rubbing my water eyes, eating ginger for my scratchy throat and stopped up nose, aching all over my whole body and sleeping as much as humanly possible.

Last, but not least, I’m whining. Yes, whining. Colds usually last seven to ten days as long as nothing becomes infected which means today is Day 4, so I’m whining because I’m pretty miserable.

M.I.S.E.R.A.B.L.E.

I CAN and DO a lot of things GREAT and I handle MANY situations FANTASTICALLY, but when I get sick, I’m a whiner. I think all my other good traits make up for me being a whiner when I’m sick. If my whining bothers you, may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your crotch and may your arms be too short to scratch. Ha! Just kidding.

This is JUST the common cold, so I’m VERY GRATEFUL that overall I’m pretty healthy most of the time. Besides, I have Bella right here beside me doing her regular nurturing. She has to be one of the cutest dogs ever born…really.