You can tell from all the photos that I’ve posted of myself that I’m a totally tanned sun Goddess, right? (wondering if anyone will believe me even though my pale face is in the header photo)
Anyway, we decided to go to the pool over the Memorial Day weekend even though I was told that I appeared to be wearing white socks when I put on my sandals. Oh yeah, people love, love, love to tease me.
Taking my place under the large umbrella at a table close to the pool, I had a great view of everything.
There was a guy who used spray sunscreen and applied it in stripes down his chest. After he was sufficiently burned, his chest looked like the stripes on the United States flag – red, white, red, white…
Lesson #1 – Although I am whiter than a sheet of paper, I at least know how to apply sunscreen! So if you can’t apply sunscreen correctly, stay inside out of the sun!
I took a banana to eat and a book to read. The days when I play tea party while sitting on the bottom of the pool have been over for a long time.
Lesson #2 – Don’t forget to take water to drink because even if it isn’t hot outside, two hours is long enough to get thirsty.
Alyssa is a pro at getting tanned, applying sunscreen, wearing suitable pool attire, buying bathing suits and taking everything necessary to sit comfortably at the pool for hours.
Lesson #3 – Having an intelligent daughter who prepares appropriately is a wonderful blessing especially when she shared her fruit flavored water! It sure was so delicious because I got really thirsty. I’m so out of practice with this kind of stuff! Sometimes I feel like I’ve been hidden in a cave for the last four years.
The first picture on the left also proves that I’m not very good at taking selfies. Like, where is my face? Nope, no face. Instead, you see lots of hair!
Then in the second picture, I had the camera too low. According to Alyssa, I shouldn’t take pictures shooting up my face because no one wants to look up my nose. Why not? My nose isn’t THAT bad. (totally laughing my head off)
Lesson #4 – People at the pool stare when someone is taking pictures and selfies especially when the photographer keeps laughing. (It didn’t bother me a bit. Actually, it made me laugh harder.)
What does it take to get a centered picture of me that includes my face?
Well, it takes my daughter holding the camera in order to have my whole face show in the photo! Isn’t that just pathetic?!!! My arms just are not long enough and I am not coordinated enough to wrestle with the camera for a good selfie. (rolling my eyes at myself)
Lesson #5 – Alyssa must always live at home so that I can have pictures of myself. (She’s going to just love that one! LOL)
Last, but not least, there is one more thing that I was reminded of while sitting by the pool.
Lesson #6 – Some women’s bathing suits cover less than my bra and underwear. The reaction in my head upon seeing them ranged from, “Oh no, you’re burning my eyes” to “I’m so jealous of your body.”
Is it winter yet? Is it time to get out the big bulky sweaters and thick coats? What happened to the days when tanning was out and paleness was in?!
I thought the knee-selfie was good. Don’t be so hard on yourself! 🙂 You constantly make me smile with your humor on Twitter. Glad I popped over to read the full version here. And glad to hear you had a fun Memorial Day!
Thank you very much Laurie! LOL
You have beautiful nostrils! Tell Alyssa I said so!! Even on an overcast day, in which burning is a bigger hazard due to the sun being magnified through the water vapor of the clouds, YOU CAN’T FORGET THE WATER! Glad you had the sense to not become a walking flag! I even have to throw on some sunscreen on my left arm on occasion so my tan, or lack of, is kept in check.
But sitting by the pool evaluating swimwear? I always thought that was a given.
Maybe you could become Alyssa’s agent and book her some clients so she could provide poolside safety!
Thank you for sharing your adventure. Delightful and educational!!
LMBO Jerel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If I told Alyssa that I have beautiful nostrils, she would think both you and I had lost our minds! LMBO!!!
I’m glad you enjoyed the silly post. 😉
Of the six lessons you learned number five was the most important! “Lesson #5 – Alyssa must always live at home so that I can have pictures of myself.” Oh, I so agree. Alyssa should live at home until she is at least one hundred. Maybe we should make that two hundred just to be on the safe side! 🙂
LOL I agree! Alyssa should live at home until she is 200 years old! LOLOLOLOL
A Goddess YES! A dark tan, LOL,I don’t think so but you know they sell the spray on tan…….we used it back in Feb. when we went to Key West, just don’t wear anything white!
Miss you girl!
Ha! Thank you Don. I miss having lunch with you everyday. It just isn’t the same without all the laughs. {{{hugsss}}}
This was so cute! I feel the same way about my youngest son…he must always live at home to take my pictures! Thanks for sharing on the Thursday Blog hop!
Thank you Pam!!! I’m glad you liked the post!
Oh my! Are you sure we arent sisters?? I too am unable to sit in the sun – even with sunscreen I just lobsterize! And I don’t know if it’s a mom thing or what but I am incapable of taking a selfie that doesn’t chop off some part of my head! Thanks for the chuckles! Renea
Renea, I’m so glad that all your selfies chop off part of your head. I don’t feel so alone anymore. LOL 🙂
I am awful at selfies too!! I don’t like them for the most part! LOL! Also, I don’t like swimsuits either. Ofcourse some people’s clothes today cover less than my bathing suit! LOL!
You are sooooooooooo right April! My bathing suit actually covers more of my body that some women’s regular clothes. LMBO!!!
No pool weather for us here yet. I’m still working on my selfie skills – my boys say I’m pretty hopeless. Costco has a great water pitcher 2 pack that has a diffuser in the middle to put fruit – works like a charm and the water is so good!
Another waning selfie taker! I’ve added your name to the club! 😉
The pitcher pack sounds great! I’ll have to check it out at Costco. Thanks for the heads up!
you make me smile, you are beautiful my friend, your knee your nostril your side. I miss going swimming.
Thank you for sharing your sweet blog at the Thursday Favorite Things Blog Hop. Your participation helps to make it extra special ?
That’s is so sweet of you to say Katherine. Thank you so much for you constant friendship. I truly wish we lived closer to each other. {{hugsss}}