Chuckle of the Day – Redheads, Genie & Money

A man was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp.

He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie. The genie said “Okay, okay. You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month and I’m getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. You only get one wish!”

The man sat and thought about it for a while and said, “I’ve always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I’m scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive my car there?”

The genie laughed, “That’s impossible. Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete-how much steel! And the maintenance of that bridge! No – think of another wish.”

The man said okay and tried to think of a really good wish.

Finally, he said, “I’m married to a redhead. So, I wish that I could understand her… know how she feels inside and what she’s thinking when she gives me the silent treatment… know what she really wants when she says ‘nothing’… know how to make her truly happy… I want to know how she can be so sexy one second and be the Devil’s daughter, the next. I really want to understand her and how she thinks!”

The genie said, “You want that bridge with two lanes or four?”

There was a man who had worked all his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real miser when it came to his money.

Just before he died, he said to his redhead wife, “When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me.”

So he got his wife to promise him, with all of her heart, that when he died, she would put all of the money into the casket with him.

Well, he died. He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there – dressed in black, and her friend was sitting next to her. When they finished the ceremony, and just! before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, “Wait just a moment!”

She had a small metal box with her; she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down and they rolled it away. So her friend said, “Girl, I know you were not foolish enough to put all that money in there with your husband.”

The loyal wife replied, “Listen, I’m a Christian; I cannot go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money into the casket with him.”

“You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him?!!!”

“I sure did,” said the wife. “I got it all together, put it into my account and wrote him a check. If he can cash it, then he can spend it.”